We make a decision to change based on one of two very different motivators: ‘Away From’ and ‘Toward’. Here’s the way I define them:

‘Away From’: The pain of the current situation exceeds the perceived pain or risk of change, so it becomes advantageous to change.

‘Toward’: Something is so compelling that you can’t NOT do it.

You undoubtedly already know where I’m going with this.

Many of us reinventers make the decision to reinvent based on an ‘Away From’. Possibly more than one. When I did my initial big reinvention, I was a classic case of this. Here were my reinvention ‘tipping points’:
• “I can’t stand my job any more. It’s way too stressful. It’s not me. It’s taking a huge toll on my health and well-being.”
• “I’m not happy in my relationship. Really not happy.”
• “I’m feeling trapped and claustrophobic living in downtown Chicago. If I see one more pile of black snow, I’m going to lose it.”

Do any of these sound familiar?

These really are not an exaggeration, in my case, sadly. I’m sure you’re looking at this list and thinking, “not exactly a solid foundation for a successful or smooth life and work reinvention.” You would be right. Unbelievably, that didn’t occur to me at the time.

A riveting ‘Away From’ will accomplish one thing, and it did that very effectively with me. It was the impetus that jolted me out of my unconscious reverie (my putting one foot in front of the other and just trying to get through each day) and propelled me into a decision to reinvent, to finally take action.

Then came the rub.

For reinventers, the problem with an ‘Away From’ motivator is that it is not sustainable. Once you are ‘away from’ whatever it is, the pressure is off and there is nothing to pull you forward. Hence the “Oh-S**t-What-Did-I-Do” factor.

It will probably be a huge relief for a while. When that wears off, you’ll need a powerful ‘Toward’.

I tried to get along with an attitude of: “Well, this is a lot better than the life I had before.” You can feel that doesn’t have any pulling power. I had no clear vision.

Contrast this with my current work vision, my ‘Toward’: “I will help 10,000 life and work reinventers, with hope, inspiration, and ‘how’, by 2011.”

Or my lifestyle ‘Toward’: “I’m creating a wildlife refuge on my 5 acres in the country. It is an oasis in nature that nurtures and refreshes me every day.”

These two ‘Toward’s’ are so compelling for me that I can’t wait to ask the question “What’s next?” every day. And when I feel my energy slipping, I take a moment to feel the power of these ‘Toward’s’.

Does this mean that if you have a solid and extremely compelling ‘Toward’ that everything in your reinvention will be smooth sailing? It might, but it’s probably not likely. Sorry.

A compelling ‘Toward’ gives you something even more valuable. It gives you a knowing that you are on your reinventer’s true path and that it is unfolding in alignment with who you are and what you want. Remember, a reinvention is a ‘coming home’, and it is nice to know that you are heading towards the right home.

What it also means is that when the going gets a bit tough, or your reinvention takes an unexpected turn, you have the energy of your vision, clear intention, and passion to get you out of bed in the morning and through your day.

It will be the True North that fuels you and calls to you. When you tune into your inner guidance, your Compass, this will be the point that your Compass aligns with to answer the ever-present question: What next action is a match to my true nature and compelling vision? You probably don’t say it that way, but that’s what you need to know every day.

You may already have your ‘Toward’. If you do, take a few moment to connect to the power of it every day. Let it inspire you and call you forward. A few moments of really connecting with your ‘Toward’ can power your whole day.

If you don’t have a ‘Toward’, find it. The reinventer’s path will be much more rewarding and joy-filled when you do.

If you are thinking about a reinvention and haven’t embarked on it yet, take some time to focus your true desires, the really compelling ones, into a powerful ‘Toward’. Then you won’t even need the ‘Away From’.

START HERE

Action: Before you take any action commit to digging deep to find your ‘Toward’.

Insight: What is your ‘Toward’? (For now; it will probably change and evolve as you reinvent) What do you really want? How does it inspire you?

Filed under: Your Compass, Being a Reinventer on March 27th, 2007